Needing Positive Vibes....

A lot of good things have been happening here. I have been released to drive and I am learning how to pick baby's up and clean as a cripple (he he). Why is it then that I have been completely nuts this week? I have been trying and trying to figure out what in the world is going on with me and the thing I am realizing is my attitude is sucking. I should be thrilled, no extactic that things can slowly start getting back to normal around here but instead it seems like all I can focus on is the negative. What's not working instead of what is. What's done is done. I have had this happen to my back. I can't undue or change that so why not just think that I am going to heal and get totally back to normal? I just don't get it. I have been having so much anxiety and fear about what is going to happen with me down the road. (sure wish I wouldn't have done work comp for 2 years dealing with people who NEVER seem to heal from back surgery) I had my first Physical Theraphy appointment and I did great, but afterwards had a lot of pain. I am sure this is totally normal, but instead of keeping positive and not worrying about it I spent a good part of the night feeling like I am doomed to a life with a bad back and I will never be able to do normal activities or run again. I need to feel positive! Half of how well your body recovers after things like this is how you mentally feel about it. I have got to make a committment to stay positive and believe that I can and will get totally back to normal. I need to believe! The end